An Ode To My Chocolate Drop

She is the only chocolate that I love more than my Godiva Baby ((Jonathan))....it's my younger sister's Kishelle, who ever knows as Huda! She's 17 years right now and I love her dearly....but trust me, when she was younger, we had problems! When I was in high school, she was in middle school and she was a little trick! She used to tell on every damn thing! No, really! Everything I did she told my mama! When I did stuff in school, she told, I did stuff at home, she told!!!! But she's cool now. We have an understanding. A code....siblings stick together against the parents! lol...Now that we are older, and we are closer, I honestly dont know what I would do without her. She is one of my very best friends. There isnt anything that we cant discuss. She is always there for me when I need a shoulder to cry on or it's time to strap up to go to combat and fight! And I will be there, no I am there, whenever she needs me for whatever reason. She is truly my backbone and support system. I know if I dont have anyone else in the world, that I will have her. She is my one and only and I would die for her if need be. If she ever needs a lung, kidney, anything, she knows she can call me up and Im there, on my way ASAP, dropping whatever Im doing. Even tho we got off to a rocky start in the beginning, our relationship developed and blossemed into a beautiful thing and I wouldnt change a thing about her! I SUPER♥ my chocolate drop. I really and truly dont know where I would be today without her. Love you babes!

She Aint No DIVA! ((No...She's Really NOT!))

I write on things that I see happening around me or things that I feel. And as of lately, I keep seeing females claiming to be either, "5 Star Bitches", "Divas", or dare I say it, "Bosses" or "Boss Bitches"....lmao....Didn't you just crack up just reading just that small part? I know I did!

Imma break this down because each title needs its own section.....

First there's the "5 Star Bitches"

First off, I feel like if you are 18 and over, or under 18 and have children, or you just have children period, you no longer should refer to yourself as a ''bitch"...you now have a little person looking up to you for guidance. You are somebody's role model ((hoepfully))...don't you want to make a good example for your children of how they should be or act? What to accept from someone else and what not to accept? I mean if you call yourself a bitch, and your man/boyfriend/husband calls you a bitch, you are telling your son that it is okay to call women bitches or your daughter that is okay to allow a man to disrespect her and call her a bitch. Children are like little sponges, they soak up everything they hear, see, and feel. And they feel like if it's okay for this to happen because it happens in my house, than it's okay for it to happen on the street....WRONG! Nip stuff like that in the bud now....set examples in your household...and dont call yourself or allow anyone else to call you a bitch....got it? Good! And let's be real, the majority of these females that are calling themselves "5 Star Bitches" are really closer to 1 or 2 on the scale! Helllo!....moving on....lol

Second, there's the "Diva"

According to dictionary.com, a diva is, "a distinguished female singer; prima donna." This term was invented and established in the 1880s. Alright now, I dont know why Beyonce said that a diva "is a female verision of a hustla"...its sells songs but that is wrong my dear....sorry Beyonce fans....lol....it's an established singer...which Beyonce is....half of these girls that are using the term ARE NOT DIVAS. Get your act together. Oh, you think you are a diva because you "getting money"? Riiiigghhhttt....refer to my very first blog, "So You Getting Money Right"....enough said on that...moving on.....

Third, there are the "Bosses/Boss Bitches"

There are several definitions for boss, but I will use the first defintion when boss is used as a noun and the first definition when it is used as a verb. According to dictionary.com ((state the sources where you get your facts from people lol)), a boss is 1.) "a person who employs or superintends workers; manager". Just by that definition alone....98% of the people who uses the term boss, has been discredited. You claim you are a boss, but you do not own your own company or corporation. You do not employ anyone else, someone employs you, and that's even if YOU have a job to begin with. You don't superintend or manage your workers, because you don't have any! The first definition of boss when used as a verb, according to dictionary. com is, "to be master of or over; manage; direct; control.". Again, you can't do any of these things unless you employ other people, which you don't! The only boss you can be, is that over your children and maybe younger siblings, if you have any...other than that, you aint bossin a damn thing!

Now let's recap....if you are 18 or over or have children, the word bitch should be removed from your vocabulary, for your children's sake and because you are too damn old to be calling yourself a bitch! Grow up! A diva is a singer, not the female verision of a hustler, sorry! And a boss is someone who manages his/her employees....you are not a boss if you do not have a job and if at your job, you a peon ((at the beginning stages))....

I dont mean to burst anybody's bubble....ok, I do....but I just want this to be a wake up call, for people to grow up and take care of their business and this applys to everyone....college students, young parents, old parents, anyone who uses these phrases uncorrectly....call it like it is....You wanna be something? Try being a responsible adult or a positive role model, in your children's life and in everyone else's...

"What you say? SHE AINT NO DIVA?!" Well, she ain't.......

I Finally Found My Sock....

There's a theory that every person is born with one sock, and you find your matching sock when you find your soulmate/the person you are suppose to spend the rest of your life with...and I def found my sock ya'll!!! Jonathan Dowdy is everything that I could ever want in a man...he makes dreams come true that I never knew I had. He makes me want to be a better individual and a better woman for both me and him. I love him sooooo much. I never knew that I could feel like this....I feel like...I was hopeless....was about to give up on love and he gave me a second chance at that. He gave me an opportunity to see what a real man was and what real love was. Tears are coming to my eyes as a write this blog, because that's how much emotion and passion I have for him. I never see this love nor passion that I have for him fading...in fact, it grows deeper and more profound every day...even with us apart...me in Washington, DC for school and him back at home in Chicago.

Whheeewwwww....I am just speechless, over edge and just breatheless, I never thought I would catch this....catch what you ask? This LOVEBUG ya'll. He is the last person I think of, the last face I see before I close my eyes and drift off to sleep and he is the first person and first face that comes to my mind when I open my eyes. I can close my eyes and just envision him in front of me. I can see his face and all the details of it....I can see his arm and his muscls and his veins, his legs, his stomach, his thighs, **Oscar ((inny))** lol....I can just see him....

Whewww....and now the tears are falling...but they are tears of joy! I cried my first tears of joy with him and I want to cry my last tears of joy with him...I want to grow old with him, and sit on the front porch of our house in Memphis ((that's where he wants to retire to, so I will with him....dont tell him just yet tho ya'll lol))...and just feel the wind on our faces as we sit back and take strolls down memory lane together. I am confident that we have that Ally and Noah love from the Notebook ((and if you havent seen it, you must! It's def a classic!))...only we didnt have to lose each other to realize how deep our love is....we always knew because we felt it in the bottom of our hearts when we gave each other our last first kiss.

I love you Jonathan Dowdy....til a day pass forever and I truly hope forever never comes for us!!!

Tis Was The Best....Better Than ALL The Rest!

This past summer...which was summer of 2009 was the best summer that I've experienced in....forever it seems! LOL....There were def those hard moments, esp with my mom and my friends, but everything worked out for the best. I def learned some lessons this summer. Although I didnt hang with my friends as much as I usually do, I did learn who my real friends were and who were really down for me! I eliminated alot of "friends" but I kept the real ones, so I didnt feel like I lost anything at all.

I also found the love of my life! Yaaayyyy!!! Jonathan Dowdy came into my life out of nowhere...well not out of nowhere, I went to high school with him, so I've known him for about eight years now....lol....but I would have never thought that we would end up dating and him being my future husband. He taught me alot this summer as well. He taught me to be patient, not to sweat the small stuff and most importantly what true and real love is. I dont know what I was doing before him, because this love is sooo real that I KNOW those other dudes in the past HAD TO BE FAKE!!!
He is the flame to the candle that sets my soul on fire. I cant picture my life without him and I honestly just dont want to! He means the world to me...but all of my love for him is for another blog....lol....but he was def one of the best, if not THE best part of my summer....him coming into my life....

I also became more "spiritual" in a sense. I didnt go to church as much as I would have liked but I did develop a better relationship with God, with Jonathan's encouragement and I am so glad I did. I learned to talk to God and to look to him for guidance. I learned not to pray for a lighter load but for a stronger back for God wouldnt put too much on me that I wouldnt be able to bear. The sin is not in getting weary, but in giving up. And I am chugging forward through this struggle that is my life with the help of God. Everything happens for a reason, and I've learned not to question that. He is there right when you need Him....He doesnt come when YOU want Him to, but He comes RIGHT ON TIME!

I also did an internship and I worked....which is a biggie for me because I have been coming home every summer for all of my college career and this is the first time I've had a job, and than I had an internship on top of that! Go figure! lol...I gets busy right before senior year!

Anywhooo....there were some laughs, some tears, and most importantly some GROWTH! This was def the best summer I've ever had, better than all the rest! It was so necessary in my life and it came at the perfect time...I would like to thank all of those who made it a *perfect* summer...no need to name names because they were there and they know who they are :)

So You Getting Money Right....

I hate to see people's stats on facebook or myspace claiming that they are getting money simply because they keep their hair done, nails done and some gym shoes. That is not getting money! That is called living check to check! And that's even if they have a job, because most times, it's their parents or grandparents that is funding their appearance. So you think you gettin gmoney right? Plllleeeaassseeee....try going to somebody's four year college, buying books and paying for housing...can you do all that? If not, you arent getting money shorty!
Im so sick of seeing people living these ghetto fab lives and they think they got it like that....you dont! You are living a simple life....you arent doing anything! You sit on your ass and collect a check for you kids...or you get money from your parents....and I havent left out the ones who think they are all good because they have a job and they pay their own bills and they got their own apartment. Sweetie please, you live in low income or section 8....your rent is less than $300 a month...and you work at a department store....lol....but I applaud you for trying....just try harder....strive for more....for yourself and for your kids (cuz I know you got one or two lol)...
And please dont get me started on these "half-ass" ballers! You know what Im talking about...the ones that have the nice cars sitting on dubs, but everytime you get in their car, the tank is always damn near at E...it's never on full....and they expect you to pay them some gas money for them coming to get you....lol....or they have unlimited everything, but they have a boost....or they stay real fresh to death...nice shoes, nice clothes, nice jewlrey but they live with their mama and it's their babymama that is paying for all those nice things that attracted the hoodrats to the male in the first place....
People, people...we need to get it together and grow up!
"They say they getting money because they got 26 inch rims on their cars, but Im the one taking trips to Africa"
sooooo the next stop you shout you getting money, sit back and think....are you really?!