Active Love

Three years ago today, Jonathan and I began dating. I would have never thought that we would have made it this far to be honest. 

Eight days ago, Jonathan got down on one knee and asked me to be his wife. 

I said yes. 

To some it was a surprise and to some it was not. 

The fact is, I said yes. 

And I do NOT regret my decision. 

And I don't regret my decision because I am actively choosing to be happy and to be in love. 

I have been loving from the side lines. Not getting back into the game. Going though the motions and just cheering from the sidelines. Being at the "game" because I was supposed to.

And I'm not going to lie, the main reason I was on the side line and not in the game, is because I got distracted. I couldn't be in the game because I knew I wasn't giving it my all. 

Now I am. 

I am putting myself back in the game. I am actively making moving towards happiness and love. And I have a great player on my team, so I know with time, hard work and dedication, I will make it to the championship (hell I already got the ring lol)

Someone once told me that falling in love was the easy part, it's the relationship and the staying in love and actually liking a person and wanting to be around a person is the hard part. I'm rolling up my sleeves and preparing myself for the long haul. 

I heard something tonight that stuck with me, 

"I chose to stay with him because of all the things he had done right instead of leaving for the one thing he did wrong. I chose to forgive"

I'm forgiving. 

I'm being happy. 

I'm falling in love. 

Actively this time.